“The heart wants what it wants,” Woody Allen once famously said. Although for Woody the quote might’ve served his own selfish purpose to bang his sorta-adopted daughter, his words ring more true than anything he put together on the silver screen or anything else he did with his ex-girlfriend’s kids. It is true in this way that the heart’s yearning may sometimes be something unexpected or controversial. And that is why it suited Woody so perfectly.

There are times when we fall head over heels for that “rough” guy. That masculine carnivore whose intense penetration might swoon a gay bottom for that moment. He gives the bottom a good ass-tearing, making the bottom think that he has struck gold. With each thrust of hard meat, the bottom’s mind is filled with elation and gratification… but what about the heart? His feminine mind is lost in the ecstasy of the moment while his heart wonders: Is he the right one? Is this one? Will he stay? Will he love me?

It is a truism that most gay fem boys are yearning for love; they just don’t know it or ignore it. Or when they do acknowledge it, they may set themselves up for some disappointment. It is also a truism that masculine tops are in the minority within the gay male community and are hard to find. These tops can easily find an appropriate lover from the wide range of bottoms that is available to them, and hence, that is why they make good lovers and sex partners overall.

Doing the math can reveal an answer many in the gay community dread to confront. There are more bottoms than tops. Oof… Even those who claim the mantle of “versatility” cannot help but pound their meat at pics of horny tops. Seems like for these men, they may engage in the masculine penetrative role if they have to or for the right guy. I therefore, shamelessly, regard most versatiles as “exotic bottoms.”

That is not to say they cannot hit their targets. Many gay bottoms (including the exotic ones) find a good man. They end up marrying and living happily ever after as their horse-drawn carriage goes into the sunset. And of course, there are versatiles that are who they say they are and have no problem performing either role.

However, for other gay bottoms, this isn’t the case. While getting their holes plugged and rammed might bring them temporary satisfaction, there is always a longing for a real experience of intimacy. For these men, they may have to listen to what their heart wants, and it wants affection. Badly.

Lacking the prince charming that failed to transport through the intergalactic membrane (or failed to stop being a frog in some cases), the gay fem boy bottom has another option, and that’s his dick, nature’s magic wand. He recognizes that he was born with that pesky male member and that it always pleases him when he’s alone and longing for other dicks. He could try to become a top himself, but that isn’t him. Penetrating a man may require a good dose of some masculinity, but then he sees himself fucking himself. He doesn’t want to fuck himself, at least that way. I don’t blame him.

That is to say, if anything can be said, his bottomness is an exclusively gay thing. When he’s fucking another dude in the ass, he’s seeing himself in that other dude. His mind can’t get over it, not even for a quick reach-around. It doesn’t feel right. The bottom he’s fucking has a dick too, and he’s craving it. Soon, that craving takes hold, and now he wants that dick inside of him. The other bottom isn’t into it, and there you go, the hook-up has now been interrupted by invasive thoughts.

A gay bottom is still a masculine man, but not concerning gay sex. This is one fact that many gay men seem to overlook. When he’s around other men, he immediately becomes the Omega. It’s a gay thing. So then, what about in a heterosexual context? What if the fem gay bottom is instead confronted sexually by a woman? This is where things get interesting.

There are two possible outcomes: he either doesn’t like it or he is aroused by it. Many gay bottoms do not want to be aroused by craven, horny females because it would break a special feminine bond they think they have with women. While they might have dick in their mind to suppress any natural inclinations to the opposite sex, they are still good potential sex partners for these wonder women. The special bond (and access) that he has with these women is still there, but when sex is involved, the bond takes on a new meaning. And this is when the heart finally gets what it wants.

When a fem gay boy finally penetrates his first vagina, it is an experience like no other. It is something he cannot have with men. He doesn’t feel intimidated by the girl because of their intimate, special bond. These new sensations are what the heart craves. After he finishes inside her, she clings to him. Caresses him and kisses him. Something he rarely gets from his Grindr hook-ups. Her eyes rolled back as she got her pussy filled with his warm semen. The heart pumps even more. For the fem gay boy, seeing her in that state only awakens a sleeping giant that was rumbling within. And because of his gayness, there is an advantage.

A gay fem boy that fucks one of his girlfriends, or any other female he cherishes for that matter, will not know how straight sex should feel. He only knows how it feels. It is a different world for him. An escape from the mundane routine he is used to, and thus, he views such an episode as very special and unique. He is very sweet and cuddly. His thrusts start slowly and softly to make sure he’s not hurting her. He would always ask if he’s doing it “right.” He would ask her how he should lick her cunt. The woman is surprised by all this. Never has she met a man who is so in touch with her femininity. He’s careful but not shy. He lurks around her nakedness, learning new things about a truly feminine body. As a gay fem boy, he cherishes it so greatly since he values it in his own life. He can’t see himself in her since she lacks a penis. She instead has a vagina, an intriguing organ that fits just right on his stiffy.

As he fucks her, he then recognizes how “right” it feels, and how feminine he could be without fear. The woman takes him in, holds him in her bosom. She quells his fears, and he gives her unabated tenderness. He’s not a straight man; therefore, she doesn’t need to treat him as such. Or maybe he might actually become one down the road; the thought only encourages her.

He is her gay boy lover for now. They meet in secret and fuck for a full hour or two. They can do this because they both understand each other, and all fear and apprehension has lifted. He tells her how pretty she is because he really means it. He appreciates her beauty because he knows feminine beauty, and it doesn’t scare him to say it, as most straight men would. She enjoys the mixture of feminine connection and masculine penetration. It can be an experience that changes both of their lives. She realizes that gay fem boys are still men, but special men. Fearless men.

And a surprising lover to boot.